We do not need to be people pleasers. We should be God pleasers. If we keep our hearts right and do the right thing in every situation…even when it hurts, we will be blessed.

10 God Pleaser Tips:

• Make God a priority in your life
• Read the Bible
• Honesty is always the BEST policy
• Think before you speak
• Do what you say you will
• Be generous
• Listen to people
• Apologize when you are wrong
• Be quick to forgive
• Ask for forgiveness when you fail

We will never be perfect. Thankfully, God is not looking for perfection. He is simply looking for willing vessels and He will do the rest!

Copyright © Lara Velez

Forgiveness can be a very difficult way to live. Forgiveness is extremely powerful. It can affect not only the person being forgiven, but the person doing the forgiving.

What does the Bible say about Forgiveness?

Esau forgave Jacob - In Genesis 27 Jacob has stolen his own brothers birthright and blessing! Esau was furious and vowed to kill him as soon as their father died. Jacob spent many years running. Then in Genesis 33:4-15 Esau forgives Jacob.

Most of us have had opportunities, material items, jobs, etc stolen from us. However, I would think that very few of us have experienced our sibling stealing our birthright and blessings (good wishes) from our Father.

Joseph forgave his brothers - In Genesis 37 Jacobs jealous brothers throw him in a pit and then sell him as a slave to a caravan on it’s way to Egypt! He was a slave for years and went to prison before he was blessed with the position of second in command of all Egypt. Then in Genesis 45:3-15 he has an opportunity to really stick it to them. He doesn’t! he forgives them, and even kisses and embraces them!

Can you even imagine? Your own family wanting you dead? Selling you into slavery? It’s unimaginable. However, most of us have family feuds though. One family member angry at another. Siblings. Mother and child. Father and child.

Moses forgave Miriam and Aaron - In Genesis 12:1-10 they slander Moses, and God jumps to His defense and inflicts Miriam with leprosy. In stead of thinking…she got what she deserved…in Genesis 12:13 Moses begs God to heal her.

Has anyone ever wrongly accused you of something? Slandered you? Spoke rudely to you? Have you forgiven them?

Stephen forgave the angry mob - In Acts 7:60 while being stoned to death for being a Christian and speaking the truth he asks God to forgive them with his last breath!

If I was being stoned to death…I don’t think that my last thoughts and words would be anything positive towards the ones stoning me, let alone asking God to forgive them! Maybe your a better person than I am.

Paul forgave his brothers and sisters in the Lord - In II Timothy 4:16 Paul forgives them for abandoning and forsaking him in his time of need.

Have you ever had close friends let you down? Have you forgiven them? or, are you still harboring unforgiveness and anger?

and finally, in Luke 23:34…

While innocently dying on the cross for our sins Jesus asked God to forgive the ones who put Him there! Our Savior was paying the ultimate agonizing price for not only our sins but the ones who killed Him…and He felt only love…He had no ill will…just love and forgiveness.

The examples that we just read show extremely evil wrongs that real people…regular people like you and me who forgave. They walked in forgiveness.

Why is it so hard for us to forgive someone for forgetting our birthday? Or, some other minor offense?
The Cost of Unforgiveness

Unforgiveness hinders our prayers. We are told in the book of Mark to let go of wrongs done to us and forgive before we pray.

Mark 11:25 – And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive them and let it drop (leave it, let it go), in order that your Father Who is in Heaven may also forgive you your own failings and shortcomings and let them drop.

Unforgiveness will cost us more than we realize.

Matthew 6:14-15 – For if you forgive people their trespasses [their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go, and giving up resentment], your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their trespasses neither will your Father forgive you your trespasses.

These are pretty scary words. You would think this would be enough to make us forgive…

Luke 6:37b – Acquit and forgive and release (give up resentment, let it drop), and you will be acquitted and forgiven and released.

This is classic sewing and reaping. Forgive, and be forgiven. You give, you get.

Ephesians 4:31-32 – Let all bitterness and indignation and wrath and resentment and quarreling and slander be banished from you. And become useful and helpful and kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another readily and freely, as God in Christ forgave you.

Colossians 3:13 – Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has freely forgiven you, so you must also forgive.

It is very clear that we must remember…we have been forgiven many sins. It is very clear that we must forgive others who have wronged us in any way. It is very clear that if we do not forgive…we will not be forgiven.

This is a very important thing to keep in mind. We cannot walk around thinking that we will stroll into Heaven when we’ve harbored unforgiveness in our hearts. These are not my words…They are Scripture. They are words from God to you and me. We must let it go. We need to learn to walk in forgiveness. We need to just forgive. It may be hard.

You may be thinking that you have every right to be angry at someone. They may have been completely wrong. It doesn’t matter. You have been forgiven. I have been forgiven. We must forgive. No matter what the person did, and no matter how many times the person has wronged us.

Read Matthew 18:21-35. It is very clear on forgiveness. You may have read or heard it before…but it is definitely worth reading again…frequently…lest we forget.

I urge you to search deep in your heart. Pray. Be sure that you have let go of all wrongs done to you. Let go of all animosity. Let go of all anger and hostility. No matter how big the wrong. No matter how wrong they were. Release it.

I also want to point out that God loves you. He understands that there may be situations that are very difficult for you to let go and walk in forgiveness. God is simply looking for a willing vessel. If we go to Him, and tell Him we are having trouble forgiving, He WILL help us through. I believe this with my whole heart.

I struggle with this in my own life. I still have to take a couple of things to Him on a regular basis. I know that I want to forgive. And, I know that God will help me in His time. I also know that He knows my heart and if my heart is a forgiving one, He will have mercy and grace for me when I struggle with forgiveness.

Your assignment is to do the best you can to walk in forgiveness. Admit to your Daddy in Heaven when you just can’t find the strength, and leave it with Him, and leave it with Him, and leave it with Him until it’s gone.

God Bless You!

Copyright © Lara Velez

About the Author: Lara Velez is a Christian wife and Mother. She is called to minister to women. God has blessed her with two online ministries; Wives of Faith and Moms of Faith.

Note: All Scripture was taken from the Amplified Bible

James 3:6 says; And the tongue is a fire. The tongue is a world of wickedness set among our members, contaminating and depraving the whole body…Whew, those are some strong words…but, wait, that’s not all. Proverbs 18:21 tells us; Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it for death or life. It is scary to think that my mouth has that much power.

I know that in my own life…I do not always choose my words wisely. I get angry and say stupid things. Do you?

Proverbs 29:11 says; A self confident fool utters all of his anger, but a wise man holds it back and stills it. The original Hebrew word for “utters” is ruwach (roo’vakh). It means; a violent exhalation, anger, unsubstantiability, blast, and whirlwind.

That means, when we lose our temper and spew out our anger…it’s like what a hurricane does when it hits land. It destroys everything in its path. I don’t know about you, but I can have some pretty nasty storms come out of my mouth at times.

Ephesians 4:26 says; When angry do not sin; do not let your wrath last until the sun goes down.

This tells me that it’s OK to get angry…it’s normal. We don’t have to walk around holding everything in. We do however, have to express our anger without yelling, cursing, violence, name calling, etc. That is where the anger becomes sin. How do we accomplish getting angry without a violent out burst or verbal whirlwind?

Let’s look at a few of practical examples of a woman’s wrath….how it begins…and how to counteract it.

Example One:

Your child spills a drink for the twentieth time, on the carpet that you just cleaned from the last spill. Grrrr. You explode. You begin a full verbal attack with questions the child is unable to answer, and comments that will leave them in tears. This is selfish anger. It is about you. Who cares about a rug, tablecloth, or broken dish? Are they going with you when you go to Heaven?

In this example you need to stop…bite your tongue…and leave the room. Take a deep breath, and think; “OK, this is my baby. God gave me this child to love and care for. I must show grace…I love this child. I love my child. Thank you Lord, for this wonderful and precious child.”

I know what your thinking. “Yeah, right!” What you need to understand is that you must train yourself to do this…write it down, and keep it near by. Pull it out when you feel the anger building up inside. If you continue to do this over and over again, it will become your natural response…instead of an outburst of anger.

Example Two:

Your friend is chronically late. When plans are made you are already prepared for her to be late. However, there is this event that you really want to attend, and being late would mean a bad seat. So, you tell her that you need to be there on time. She can’t be late. Well, she shows up 20 minutes late. You have spent ever one of the minutes seething. Grrr. When she shows up, you explode. You say things that should have never been said, she leaves, and you miss the event.

Of course, you have every right to be angry. Or, do you? Why did you wait for her? You should have gone without her and told her to meet you there. Or invited another friend who is on time. Another thing that is crucial in a friendship like this is communication. It may not be easy, but you must tell this person how you feel…even if they cannot handle it. Be clear. Make sure that they know you will not be going places with them if they cannot make better efforts at being on time.

Example Three:

Your man comes home from work and flops down in front of the television. He puts on some program that he enjoys (or in my case plays Nintendo). Grrrr. You begin to think: “Doesn’t he care about how I feel?” “I think he loves that stupid video game more than me!” Then the inevitable happens…you blow up. Look out…here comes a category 5 hurricane!

As you can plainly see in this example, you have thought your way right into a melt down. Does any of this sound familiar? I’m sure you can think of some of your own examples.

In a situation like this, it would be a good time to start thinking about how thankful you are to have this man in your life, or how you love his smile, laugh, whatever. ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE!

Any time that we feel rage, for any reason, we need to think about what we’re thinking about. Colossians 3:13 says; Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference, a grievance, or a complaint against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has freely forgiven you, so you must also forgive.

“But, I cant do all this!” you say. Yes, you can! You are a strong woman…even if you can’t see it…speak it. Retrain your mind to think positive, and eventually it will come naturally.

Our minds are the root of most of our fears, low self esteem, some forms of depression, doubt…it all starts in our minds…then we speak it into existence.

When you fail, don’t beat yourself up. Pick yourself up, and press on!

God Bless You!

Here are some Scriptural references to help you study this topic further: II Chronicles 7:14; Psalm 103; Psalm 139; Proverbs 3:5-6; Proverbs 14:1; Proverbs 15:4; Proverbs 16:24; Proverbs 31:26; Isaiah 54:17; Mark 11:24; Romans 8:31-39; Philippians 4:13

Copyright © Lara Velez

Note: All Scripture references were from the Amplified Translation

About the Author: Lara Velez is a Christian homeschooling Mom of two and wife to her soul mate, Rob. She is a published writer, web publisher, and entrepreneur. She runs two online ministries for women; Moms of Faith and Wives of Faith.